Hey @dashfuneralflowers!
This gets a bit further into estate/tax planning that my experience affords, but I’ll do my best at some broad strokes answers.
I think the 10 year rule is basically the government trying to prevent that money from growing tax free forever. i.e. kids can’t keep their parents money growing in the parents IRA. But your descendents can and should use their own IRAs and 401ks to maximize their own tax-advantaged growth.
And the withdrawal doesn’t and shouldn’t mean an end to investing. It just means that money has to come out of the warm, cozy confines of a tax advantaged account. But it can and should keep growing in whatever other account makes the most sense, which might be a regular brokerage account.
So, as an example: Let’s say your Roth IRA is worth $1M upon your death. Your kids take over that account, and over the course of the 10 year withdrawal window it grows to $2M. Then they take the $2M out and put it into a regular brokerage account. Over the next 5 years it grows to $3M. Then they sell everything to buy a $2.5M house. The government THEN says “hey, that first $2M was tax free thanks to the rules of the Roth, but you just made that last million without paying any tax on it… so you owe us tax on $1M, or about $200K or so”. So your kid pays $200K in taxes, ends up with $2.8M. Buys a $2.5M house and throws a party with the remaining $300,000. So the question is, do you really want your kid burning $300,000 on a party? If not, maybe avoid leaving him so much!