To move out or not to move out?

Hey Jeremy! This question has been eating me alive recently and I’d thought I’d ask someone who’s helped me better my financials in the past. I’m in a union in the Bay Area, I have one more year left until I journey out, after next year I’ll be making $110,000(gross). I’m currently renting through family but it’s starting to be too much for me mentally and spiritually. I want to have my own place. If I stay with family I can save $2300 a month rather then moving out on my own where I’d be saving $1500-$1600. Based off of what I’ve said the question seems easy to answer. My issue isn’t my financial situation but rather my mental and spiritual situation. I feel like my growth is stunted since my family’s problems become my problems. Does the extra $700 a month make it an easy choice to stay home or should I leave the nest and start a life of my own? Thank you!

Hi Nick,
I can totally relate as I have also been in this situation. From my personal experience I don’t think that saving money is worth it when it comes at the expense of your physical or mental health. (And trust me I love saving money! I slept on a Craigslist couch for 2 years to save money from buying a bed… but decided to invest in a bed to save $$ from future back related medical expenses)

Moving out of my parents’ house has allowed me to grow at a much faster rate than if I were to stay there. And even though it was a ‘waste of money’, becoming the person who you are meant to be is… ~priceless~.

But from a financial perspective it might not be that bad… here’s why:

  • You will have the mental capacity to grow in a way that could make you a higher income (whether it’s through your main job or side income)
  • Since you already have the saving mindset, you would find other ways to cut back in order to offset this expense
  • Being in a toxic home environment might have led you to spend money that you won’t feel the need to anymore once you’re on your own (maybe?)

Anyway this is something I can talk about forever. Hopefully it gave you some insight!


Thank you for taking the time to respond! I couldn’t agree more!

I’m personally all for moving out if your family + housing situation isn’t ideal. It’s so much easier to focus on making more $$ when you aren’t constantly stressing about interpersonal interactions that will have lifelong impact. I’m a big fan of making more $$ to stash away, and you can definitely use your talents, time and skillset to build extra side hustle, or even just live a more fulfilling life that helps you stay focused on your long-time goals!


Thank you! I already made things happen and I’ll be moving out at the beginning of next month. I’m excited for the growth and new experiences that will be coming my way very soon!!


Awesome!! Good luck with the move! Let us know how it goes (if you want) :slight_smile:


I love this question as I struggled with this last October. I would do it 10x over, it has helped my relationship with my parents SO MUCH as We got much needed space from each other. I save 50% of what I was saving but I also find that I’ve had to be a lot more creative and disciplined because it’s not as “easy”. Both these reasons have been invaluable! Rent modestly and you won’t regret it (if you can afford it) :blush:


So the move has been awesome! I have been splurging a bit to get to know the area and people but nothing that will kill my budget. I can’t say my relationship has gotten better with my parents (probably a bit worse) but overall having a place of my own has allowed me to thinking clearly, when needed. Thank you for all the reply’s and feedback fam!:call_me_hand:t3:


Thanks for the update! I’m glad overall it went well. I think as your parents have more time to process the fact that you have moved out, your relationship will get better. I hope that’s what happens! But anyway, that is awesome to hear. Have fun! :slight_smile:


My son moved out at 21 and a lot changed! He learned to cook for himself, he took 100% control of his finances and went crazy saving! He’s moved back in recently to go back to school but in the 2 years he was out, he saved up $20k! I was impressed!

Our relationship is better now too and I think the time on his own was well worth it for both of us. Now I’m on the hook for 4 more years while he finishes school but the growth was worth it.


That is amazing. Thanks for sharing your experience from the parent’s perspective!